When “healing” feels like it breaks you.

Why does this happen? First aid for these situations, and how to move through this.

If you're on a personal growth path; self-aware, reflective, doing your best to understand yourself, heal, grow, and live more fully, then you, or someone you know may find yourself in this situation. So it’s good to know this can happen, and what to do if it does.

You’ve been doing all the things. Investing your time, energy, and money into healing, therapy… Trying the modalities. Reading the books and blogs. Listening to pods. Devouring self-help posts on social media. Seeing the practitioners. Things seem to be feeling a bit better.

And then suddenly BOOM! You feel worse. A lot worse. Like you’ve just landed in your own inner hell. Like something cracked open and now everything hurts.

You’re anxious, disoriented, maybe even panicking, and wondering:
“Was this a healing breakthrough… or have I just broken myself more?”

You may be desperately trying to figure out, How did I get here? What happened? And how do I get back to feeling like myself again?

Let’s explore what could be happening.

When Healing Feels Harmful

This kind of “healing crisis” can feel deeply disorienting, even terrifying. Especially if you’ve spent your life holding it all together, managing, masking, functioning. And now suddenly, you’re intensely flooded, hijacked; emotionally, physically, energetically. And none of the things used to help you self-regulate each day, or come back into balance are working anymore. They don’t make a dent in this.

Here’s the thing: when we start to work through (or unearth) old trauma or emotional wounds, we’re not just thinking about the past. We’re activating it. The nervous system doesn’t distinguish between an emotional memory and a current threat. It responds as if it’s happening now.

We are expecting to feel relief, and yet we feel so much worse. It can be understandably confusing. And cause us to spiral and start looping in panic, worry and fear.

What Might Be Happening Under the Surface?

1. You opened too much, too fast.
   You may have inadvertently activated more pain than your system can safely process at once. Imagine your unprocessed emotional wounds like a big, tangled ball of wool. Sitting hidden in your unconscious. Each thread is its own wound or memory. But when you tug or feel one string, the whole thing shifts and activates. You’re not just feeling one thread. You’re feeling the entire knotted wool ball of pain and memory all at once.

And your system doesn’t know how to separate it or slow it down. It floods. It panics. It spirals. It fuels itself with more fear, worry, and panic energy. And rather than feeling better and healed, you are deep in survival mode. Hijacked by a huge amount of unprocessed survival stress, that had been sitting dormant in your system.

2. Your body is in a survival response.
   Your nervous system is firing off stress signals as if you’re under real, immediate danger. Even though it is old pain. And unless your body feels safe, healing simply can’t happen. 

Want to work with us?
If you're a Coach, Therapist, Healer or Someone in the Industry CLICK HERE
Want to Deepen your own Healing Journey or become a Practitioner CLICK HERE

Signs You Might Be in a Healing “Blow-Out” or Overwhelm State

• Intense anxiety, panic, or terror
• Feeling “fried,” like your insides are buzzing, overstimulated or burning.
• Racing thoughts, catastrophising, or mental spiralling
• Emotional flooding & hijacking
• Feeling trapped in looping thoughts, beliefs or emotions
• Caught in mental loops trying to make sense of what happened
• Deep mistrust of those around you. It may look like they are causing this pain and stress.
• Disconnection from others
• Irritability, rage, or deep grief surfacing
• Physical symptoms like insomnia, nausea, headaches, digestive issues, or body pain
• Shame, hopelessness, despair, helplessness, powerlessness, frozen, stuck, no energy
• Feeling like “there’s no way out” or “something is wrong with me,” there is “no hope and no light at the end of the tunnel.”
• Feeling like no one else can understand what is happening
• Your self-critic is working over-time. 

Sound familiar?

I’ve been there too. And not just once, but many times, to varying degrees. There was one very intense period of my life where my whole ball of wool was activated. And I was stuck in a long trauma flashback, disguised as a “spiritual awakening”, or “Dark Night of the Soul”, for years. It was so dark, debilitating & isolated. It nearly took me out.

It wasn’t until I found out about Embodied Processing somatic healing, and what was happening in my body, and stopped trying to heal faster than I could safely process and integrate, that things began to change. That I was able to find my way out. Without this work, I could still be stuck there.

The Truth: You’re Not Broken.

You’re just overwhelmed. Your system is overloaded. It’s trying to protect you. But it’s also confused, because you’ve forced healing in a way that wasn’t aligned with your body’s natural pace or rhythm.

And no one taught you how to safely process the emotional and somatic backlog you’ve been carrying for years (or decades).

If you're having what feels like emotional flashbacks, hijacking, or sensory overwhelm, 12 hour heavy crying sessions, this isn’t you regressing, or doing it “wrong.” This is old pain rising too fast, without the safety, tools, knowledge, or capacity to hold it.

Sometimes, for some people, medication like an SSRI might be a helpful temporary support. Just to get you back to baseline, to work, to functioning, to your kids. There’s no shame in that.

But also know this: It doesn’t have to stay like this. You can find your way through. And it will not feel this bad forever.

You can stabilise, and then gently do the work to unravel and resolve the old ball of wounds that have been activated.

 HAVE YOU GOT THE ULTIMATE TRAUMA THERAPY CHECKLIST YET??--

What to Do if You’re in This State

1. Stop opening more.
   No more diving into deep work right now. Don’t sign up for another breathwork journey, plant medicine, healing session, energy healing, or emotional deep-dive. Pause the series of healings. You need to stabilise, not excavate. Even some talk therapy can be too activating at this stage.

Listen to your body. If the idea of something feels stressful, or triggering, don’t do it. Choose calming, soothing, comforting activities. Right now, you are probably extra sensitive. So keep away from people, places, and things that could trigger or upset you. Stick with what feels safe. Just while you are getting stable, and back to feeling yourself again.

Be careful of quick fixes and advice. Don’t do a random inner child meditation someone suggests, or a list of somatic exercises off a PDF online. Slow down. Stabilise. Resist the compulsion of quick fixes. Get off the healing hamster wheel. For now.

2. Quadruple down on self-care.
   Your number one job right now is to self-care the sh%t out of yourself. Check in with yourself like you would a beloved child or sick friend:

What do I need in this moment?

• Lying in bed with something cosy and comforting?
• A walk in nature to feel the earth under your feet?
• Sitting outside and breathing?
• Watching light-hearted Netflix or having a warm, grounding meal?
• Eat one healthy thing. Or lots of chocolate.
• Have a warm bath with salt and lavender oil

Whatever helps you feel even slightly more supported and safer — that’s medicine right now. No shame. No pushing. Don’t beat yourself up. It’s OK to feel what you are feeling. It’s OK to honour this.

Just comfort and kindness. Place your focus on your own well-being as much as you can. Even in a tough environment, carve out personal space for extra care and rest.

3. Be discerning with who you talk to.
   And whether you talk about this at all. Rehashing and retelling what’s going on, especially when your body is still in a loop, can deepen trauma activation. It can flood you further with stress chemicals and keep you stuck.

And talking to the wrong people? That can be traumatising in itself. If someone can’t meet you with kindness, gentleness, acceptance, compassion, no judgement, and safety, it can leave you feeling more alone, more broken, and less trusting.

You wouldn’t go to the butcher to get your dry cleaning done. Don’t go to just anyone with your tender, raw, traumatised inner world.

Speak with someone who’s trauma-informed. Who understands emotional flashbacks and nervous system dysregulation. Who knows how to sit with you without judgment, fixing, or spiritual bypassing. Who knows how to guide you through healing, not just crack you open and leave you there.

If you’re in Australia, there are free call crisis lines with trained professionals who can help with acute support. Check what’s available in your area. Or speak with your GP. If things feel completely unmanageable, go to the ER. Support is available. There is a way through.

4. Slow right down.
   Let your body set the pace. Process only what’s already come up, one thread at a time, gently, with appropriate support. Let go of the urge to rush or fix. This isn’t about doing more. It’s about going slow enough for real integration. Focus on the healthy basics, your foundation. Proper sleep, nutrition, taking your meds, showering, walking or sitting outside in nature, connection with a pet or safe person. 
5. Know this isn’t a forever state.
   You will not be permanently stuck here. But right now, you are in a healing crisis, and it will take time and care to return to balance again. While you’re moving through this, keep it in the day. Or the next hour. Or the next minute. Set course for stability and peace. Steer clear of anything which depresses or upsets you. Listen to your body on this. 

This is the work I do now...

Not because it’s a trend, hack or quick fix, but because I lived through this forced “healing” chaos, and I know what’s needed to get through and reach the other side. I know this works because I’ve lived it. When nothing else helped, this work did. It offered a way through when everything else left me stuck (or sent me backwards). Back then, I didn’t have access to this kind of information or support, so I share it now in the hope that it reaches the ones who need it most.

Together, practicing Embodied Processing, we can create a sense of inner safety, so that you can finally explore and integrate these overwhelming emotions, memories, and sensations. Not all at once, but at the pace that feels safe in your body.

One thread, one sensation at a time. In a safe container of a one on one session. 

That’s how we begin to lovingly, gently untangle the big ball of unconscious pain that keeps hijacking your present-day life.

Because we need to feel safe to heal. Going slowly is powerful. Learning to be with ourselves — gently, compassionately, without pushing or striving — is what allows real, lasting transformation.

In this space, we work with your body’s wisdom, not against it. We don't override your body's natural healing rhythms. We tap into this and work with the body. We build safety, awareness, capacity. And we lovingly unwind the tangled threads, one at a time, until that big, messy, painful ball of wool starts to soften, and then unravel.

And you feel like your true self again. The one who was always there shining, unbroken, behind the storm clouds.

Written by Justine Lloyd
Embodied Processing Practitioner L2

To make a 1:1 booking with Justine:
👉 https://tidycal.com/justinesomatictherapy

Or follow her insights on Facebook and Substack: 

https://www.facebook.com/Justine.somatichealing

https://justinelloyd.substack.com/ 

More info on the Embodied Processing Practitioner Training here