Imagine for a moment that you’re in your mother's womb and you can hear your parents having an awful argument.
You feel your mother's anger, loneliness and hurt... as her emotions pump through your tiny body.
As you are in the womb, you are getting to know yourself, the world and the environment that you are going to be born into.
The range of cortisol and the stress that you feel amplifies your conscious thoughts and a belief burns into your biology that… conflict is scary.
You are now encoded with the belief that you should have fear of conflict & that this is what relationships look like.
Your parents don’t know any better, as they were shown the same & weren’t aware of any childhood wounds that may be playing out in their relationship.
Now that you're an adult, you may still have this belief.
It possibly plays out in your relationships as it’s been encoded into your brain & body that this is what ‘love looks like’.
It either plays out as avoiding any kind of conflict (not allowing truly intimate & vulnerable relationships), or replaying the dynamic of highly emotional and aggressive arguments.
Regardless of how it plays out in life, this unconscious belief is the root cause of the issues.
As you can imagine, approaching this with talk therapy alone would only go so far.
It would be the equivalent of trying to take down a large weed, leaf by leaf, and still maybe never getting to the actual roots.
Why? Because the origination is pre-conscious.
Giving someone ongoing tools & education is helpful, but what is more helpful is if we can approach it on more levels.
Working with the mind/body (nervous system), biology & generational trauma simultaneously can be quicker, safer, and less frustrating (for the client & therapist or coach) to actually get to the root cause & somatically release the emotions and perceptions created at the time.
If you are ready for an easy-to-use tool, which allows for deep and effective healing, then we invite you to look into our certification trainings.
Effective and safe trauma healing is the way forward when it comes to transforming your and your clients' lives. Please feel free to share this blog with anyone that comes to mind that you think may gain value from it.
See you soon,
Melissa Hiemann (Creator of Root-Cause Therapy)