Last week I discussed the dynamics and conditioned responses of the nervous system that underpin pathological narcissism and create the dynamic between abuser and the abused.
Of course, there are many other factors aside from just the conditioned fight reflex that are embedded within the structure of narcissism, such as disturbances in the development of self representations and fractured psychic structures due to arrests in childhood individuation. Nonetheless, for reasons of understanding the dynamics the fundamentals are more important than the details in this case and it is not necessary to fully understand the finer details in order to heal or gain deeper insight.
This week I am going to discuss healing from narcissism and from narcissistic abuse.
My intention is not to offer a...
Imagine for a moment that you’re in your mother's womb and you can hear your parents having an awful argument.
You feel your mother's anger, loneliness and hurt... as her emotions pump through your tiny body.
As you are in the womb, you are getting to know yourself, the world and the environment that you are going to be born into.
The range of cortisol and the stress that you feel amplifies your conscious thoughts and a belief burns into your biology that… conflict is scary.
You are now encoded with the belief that you should have fear of conflict & that this is what relationships look like.
Your parents don’t know any better, as they were shown the same & weren’t aware of any childhood wounds that may be playing out in their relationship.
Now that you're an adult, you may still have this belief.
It possibly plays out in your relationships as it’s been encoded into your brain & body that this is what ‘love looks like’.